Industry Update
Opinion Article 5 December 2017

Why The World is NOT Full of Guys

...please use the correct words

By Steve DiGioia

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Respect. We all want it, need it and deserve it. But when we use words that have "no meaning" we carelessly speak with disrespect to our customers. Why do we continually refer to "everyone" as a guy?

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Over the course of my training career I have constantly said "words have meaning". We must speak with clear intent, understanding that our words bring life to all situations. Click To Tweet

With a few sincerely-meant words we can easily take a dissatisfied customer and turn them around, providing we use appropriate actions to match. Just as easily, we can take a content customer and, using a few seemingly innocent words, show disrespect, imply a lower status and diminish their worth.

Here's an example that I bet most of you have encountered…

A family of 4; father, mother and 2 teenage daughters, enters one of the thousands of themed restaurants that dot America. They are greeted at the door with "Hi guys, welcome to …………..".

A few more steps inside they reach the host/hostess stand where they again are greeted in a similar manner; "Hi guys, table for 4?"

Next, they are directed to their table and promptly greeted by their server; "Hi guys, can I get you something to drink?"

In total there have been 3 staff interactions with this customer family and within 2 minutes called "guys" 3 times. The only "guy" there is the father. Why have these greetings become so sexist?

Maybe sexist is a harsh term, how about demeaning or at least inappropriate?

Or does it come down to today's use of slang has permeated society so much that we are unaware of how some may take offense to certain words.

In the customer service industry, and I dare say conversations in general, there is no reason to refer to a customer by his/her age, sex, marital status, religion, height, weight, etc.

We would NEVER say this to a customer upon entering our door; "Hi Fatso, welcome to …………" or "Good afternoon Big Nose, how can I help you today?" (my apologies for offending anyone reading this – just trying to get a point across).

Of course that's outright mean and demeaning. I agree. But the world is not full of "guys" so why do so many refer to everyone as a "guy"?

Watch most of today's television shows, what do you hear? An assault on our language. You don't' hear the words please, may I, you're welcome or other pleasantries of years past. We hear slang, and terms not suitable for the industry I love, customer service.

As part of my training I coach others to refrain from using the word "ladies" or "ma'am" to remove the potential stigma(s) attached to it.

Sure, referring to a middle age woman as ma'am may be respectful and somewhat appropriate but do so to a group of 20'somethings. You'll get an uneasy glare from some and possibly make the others feel older than they wish. There is no need for this.

Our job is to never make our customers feel uncomfortable.

Customers must feel welcome and receive a warm show of appreciation, that's our goal. Click To Tweet

It's so easy to do.

Just greet them with a sincere "Good afternoon, welcome to …………….., how may I help you?"

Then what about "Hi girls"? When spoken to a group of 8 year olds enjoying a birthday party, that may be fine but to the same table of 20'somethings? Are we to assume each is a "girl"?

Today's hairstyles, clothing and sexual identification make it a minefield I am unwilling to cross. So why bother? Must we refer to a customer by a label which may not be appropriate? I say no.

Just as it is easier to remember the truth, versus a lie, it is easier to speak to/with a customer when we do not succumb to the cute phases that may be in style today.

As a customer we deserve a fair price, quality merchandise and respect. Anything less than that is unacceptable…even in a room full of "guys".

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Like this post and are you tired of being called a "guy"? Subscribe to my blog today and receive a FREE copy of my eBook: "10 Phrases That Should Never Be Used in the Customer Service Business".

This article was originally featured on Steve DiGioia's blog and is republished here with permission.

Copyright © 2017 Steve DiGioia

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Steve DiGioia

A customer service trainer, coach, author and speaker, Steve uses his 20+ years of experience in the hospitality industry to help companies and their employees improve service, increase morale and provide the experience their customers' desire. Author of "Earn More Tips On Your Very Next Shift...Even If You're a Bad Waiter" and named an "ICMI Top 50 Customer Service Thought Leader" and a "Top Customer Service Influencer" by CCW Digital, Steve continues his original customer service, leadership and management-based writings on his popular blog.

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