Revenue Management is like teenage Sex...yes , you read correctly — Photo by Infinito

What a way to start the day, ey!?!?! ;-) You’ve heard it. Now let’s really unpack it:

“Revenue Management is like teenage sex: Everyone talks about it, nobody really knows how to do it, everyone thinks everyone else is doing it, so everyone claims they’re doing it too.”

And as much as I wish I could refute it, well… welcome to half the hotels I’ve consulted for.

Let’s break it down, shall we?

1️⃣ “Everyone’s Talking About It”

Revenue Management! Total Revenue! Profit Optimization! Forecasting Models! You’d think half the industry had a PhD in dynamic pricing the way they drop buzzwords in meetings. But ask them to explain displacement cost or unconstrained demand and suddenly it’s... crickets.

Talking RM is easy. Doing it right? Not so much.

2️⃣ “Nobody Really Knows How to Do It”

Most hotels have some version of RM. But it’s often a patchwork of gut feelings, last year’s budget, and Excel sheets with 49 tabs and no formula integrity. Not exactly the Kama Sutra of pricing strategy.

“We do revenue management.” Cool. Is that before or after you copy and paste your comp set’s rates and OTB data?

3️⃣ “Everyone Thinks Everyone Else Is Doing It”

This one’s the killer. Because your GM thinks the hotel across the street has a “whole strategy team.” The owner read a LinkedIn post about AI in pricing. And the sales team? They’re convinced revenue just… happens.

So we throw together a monthly meeting, share a STR report, nod a few times, and pretend everything’s optimized.

Meanwhile, the rooms are 40% full, the bar is empty, and we’re running a weekend promo in the middle of corporate season. And all of a sudden it is not the Ghostbusters you wanna call.

4️⃣ “So Everyone Claims They’re Doing It Too”

Because no one wants to admit they’re… ahem… inexperienced.

So we dress it up. Add a pricing tool, slap on a forecast slide, rename the reservations manager to "Revenue Executive" ... boom. We’re “doing revenue management.”

Just don’t ask what our pickup curve looks like. Or how we measure conversion. Or how we align with marketing. Or… you get the idea.

Here's the Truth:

Revenue Management isn’t about pretending. It’s about performance.

It’s not how much you say: It’s how well you do:

✅ Understanding demand patterns ✅ Optimizing inventory across channels ✅ Driving profit, not just occupancy ✅ Aligning sales, marketing, and ops ✅ Owning your data like it’s your favorite playlist

So yes, RM is like teenage sex.

But you know what’s better than pretending? Learning. Practicing. Asking questions. Failing forward. And maybe… hiring a coach who’s done it before. 😉

Don’t worry. We’ve all been there. Now let’s grow up and get good at it.

Love, Fabi

PS: Call me if you need to!

View source